Christmas again またクリスマス

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Christmas is kinda over, again. But we all know that the preparations is the nice part. The last days have been rather stressful, kids everywhere and food to make and the constant background stress of feeling that I actually should relax but still can’t.
クリスマスがまた終わった。準備のほうが面白いポイントだけど。クリスマスの日々が結構忙しくて、子供がいっぱいいて飯などの準備などのやることがいっぱいあった。しかも急ぎながら休みだから落ち着くべきだけどできないこと知っているでもっとストレスがたまる。

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And I think this is the first Christmas, during which I didn’t really feel much Christmas spirit. You know, that magical feeling that was super strong as a kid but slowly has faded over the years. I don’t know if it’s me getting old or if my stressed out brain is fooling me, but I rarely feel excited about stuff nowadays and Christmas wasn’t one of them either. Anyhow, some people say that the most confusing time of womens life is in the end of their 20’s so I’m just gonna hope that this indifference will go away and that whatever comes out on the other side of it is agreeable.
今年のクリスマスは初めてのクリスマス気分がまったくないのだった。子供のころにすごく強く感じた魔法のやおうなクリスマス気分が次第に毎年弱くなったけど今年のはただ無し。年なのかストレスのせいだか分からないけど最近ほとんどわくわくすることがほとんどない。クリスマスもそう。女の人生の中一番混乱する時は20代後半だとよく言われるからこの冷淡や不熱心が消えるまで待つしかないかなあ。消えたら出た自分がいい人だといいんだけど。

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I’m going to Japan tomorrow, which I really hope will be as good as it used to be. This time we only have around 9 days there, and I fear I might stress around trying to meet as many people as possible and do as much stuff as possible. At least the food is good there and I will try to enjoy all of it as much as I can. Think mindfulness. I think the last days of candy and heavy food gluttony hasn’t been too good for my stomach or my brain to be honest. At the moment I feel like just going vegan for the next year. Maybe that should be my New Year’s resolution? As if it would make things better…
明日日本に行く。昔ほど楽しくなるといいんだけど。今回9日間しかいないからできるだけ友達に会ったり、ものを見たりしようんだろう。ストレスがまたたまるかなあ。せめて食べ物が美味しくて超楽しみ。ちゃんと楽しめるように頑張りたい。マインドフルネス精一杯!たぶんこのクリスマスに食べた重い食べ物やお菓子などが体も頭もよくないと正直に思う。来年野菜だけ食べようか。何の解決にはならないんだろうけど。

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Well well, I’m off to bake gift ginger bread for my Japanese friends and to hang out with my nephews and nieces. And then soon Japan. Sorry about all the whining. I know I should be happy.
では、今からお土産のジンジャーブレッドを作らなくちゃそして姪と甥建ちと遊ばなくちゃ。そしてもうすぐ日本。文句をいっぱい書いて申し訳ない。うれしくなるはずだし。

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7 thoughts on “Christmas again またクリスマス

  1. It is always nice to see family and friends at Christmas, but my experience is that if you are too busy, some of the joy can be lost. I’ll ask my wife if she had the same feeling when she was in her late twenties. For me, that was an uncertain time, a combination of trying to solidify both my personal and work lives. Have a great time in Japan!

    1. Thank you for your comment for sharing your experience! I guess that this time of confusion is not only something that women experience but people in general. I suppose that once school is over and work has turned into an everyday matter, we all get confused about what the next step in life is. How did you cope with your uncertain times, did it sort itself out naturally?🙂

      1. On the personal side of things, I realized that I was trying to get everything perfect and make everyone happy. Once I stepped back from that, things became easier. Getting married was the most important positive result from this thinking. From a work point of view, it took a little longer, but basically I found that I can counter-balance the parts of my work that weren’t satisfying with my own projects that were more enjoyable.

  2. I hope you enjoy your time in Japan. It’s unfortunate that you didn’t go on Christmas Eve. You may have seen the old man himself taking off in his sleigh preceded by his reindeer. That would certainly have brought back your Christmas spirit.

    As to your depression, remember you contain it. It doesn’t contain you. So try not to identify with it but see it as an opportunity to rise above negativity and discover your true self. Being in your late twenties only means that you have the mystical age of 33* ahead of you when many of the greats have had an epiphany. (* 30 to 35 in approx yrs.)

    Having said that, “When did you get so many children?” (Just kidding.)

    Happy New Year!

    1. Thank you as always for your inspirational words and I hope you had a great start of the new year! And somehow thank you for classifying my state as a depression, as if it is the most normal and natural thing in the world. I feel like I’m almost not entitled to the word depression, because things in my life generally go really well and by using the word depression I seem to mock those who suffer from it in reality. But I guess there are different levels on the depression scale…
      And the epiphany of the age 33 to 35 sounds really interesting – I have to ask my mother if she experienced anything special at that time. Actually, she was 34 when I was born – maybe that’s why I’m messed up?😉

  3. I was not very confused in my late 20s. The confusion startet in my beginning 30s. I’ll be 33 in less than 6 months an I guess I’m supposed to know by now what my life should be like and where to go from here, but unfortunately I don’t. Quite stupid, isn’t it?

    1. Not stupid at all! The more I speak to people, the more I get the feeling that everyone is confused… Did you see the comment on this post of ‘Augustmeditations’ above? He is talking about some kind of epiphany at the age of 33 – maybe it’s coming for you! Keep me posted will you, and let’s be confused together!

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